Gideon and I

So as many of you know I am making my way through the bible.  I’m currently in the book of Judges.  Judges introduces us to a man who is so much like me that we must definitely be related.  If not we are most certainly cut from the same fabric.  His name is Gideon.  I am a modern day version of him and here is why:

When Gideon appears in the bible the Israelites have yet again done evil things in the eyes of God and were being punished for it by being given over in battle to the Midianites.  The Midianites ransacked their crops and so terrorized them that they found hiding places in caves to protect themselves.   Finally, desperate for help the Israelites turn back to God and call out to Him for help.

So God sends an angel to this man Gideon and tells him, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.”  (Judges 6:12 NIV)  Gideon objects, pointing out that they have been attacked repeatedly by the Midianites and abandoned by God.   But through this angel, God reassures him again, “Go in the strength you have an save Israel out of Midian’s hand. Am I not sending you?” (Judges 6:14 NIV).  God himself told Gideon not to worry!  He told him He had his back.   I mean not many people can say that God has spoken directly to them.  Most people would claim that if God spoke to THEM directly about a situation, they would surely believe that He was both real and faithful to carry out what He said.  But not this guy Gideon.  He continues to protest, “…how can I save Israel?  My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family.” (Judges 6:15 NIV)  What a doubter!  Did God not just tell Him not to worry?  God told Him that He would do it, but Gideon is looking at himself and his own ability.  He can’t imagine it even possible. 

Good thing I’m not God, because if I was at that point I would throw my hands up in the air and maybe try to fulfill my plan through someone else.  But ever patient and always understanding of our weaknesses, God persists with Gideon, “I will be with you, and you will strike down all the Midianites together.” (Judges 6:16 NIV)  Gideon still doubts that he is hearing from God and begs God to wait for him to return with a burnt offering.  When he does, he lays out his offering of meat and unleavened bread and the angel touches it with his staff and fire flares out of a rock and consumes the offering.  Proof enough right?  He had to believe that God was in this now.  For some time it seems that he does.  He listens to what God asks him to do and tears down altar of one of the false gods they had been worshiping.  He builds an altar to God and in so doing angers the Midianites.   With his life clearly threatened you would hope that Gideon would remember the promise made to him from God.  You would think he had no cause to worry and no reason to believe that God wasn’t with him.

But Gideon the doubter still isn’t sure.  He’s afraid.  He forgets those promises and asks God for reassurance.  “If you will save Israel by my hand as you have promised- look, I will place a wool fleece on the threshing floor.  If there is dew only on the fleece and all the ground is dry, then I will know that you will save Israel by my hand, as you said.” (Judges 6:36-37NIV)  And God did that for Gideon exactly as he had asked.  Unbelievably still unsure of himself he asks God for one more sign, “Don’t be angry with me.  Let me make just one more request.  Allow me one more test with the fleece.  This time make the fleece dry and the ground covered with dew.” (Judges 6:39NIV)  At that point if I were God I would have been angry.  I would have thought to myself “Really?  How many times have I shown you and you still don’t believe!”  Thankfully God is more merciful that I am, because He again does exactly what Gideon asks.  Finally Gideon believes!

So how am I like Gideon?  Well, quite plainly, I request the wet or dry fleece all the time.  If I am very honest with myself, with many prayers that I make to the Lord there is a little part of me that is looking to see if He is still real.  Even though He has reassured me over and over again, and has answered my prayers quite plainly in ways I cannot pass off as anything other than an act of His hand; I still go back to Him again and again, wondering if this time I’ll realize I was wrong about Him.  I know I’m not supposed to do this.  The bible says, “Do not put the Lord your God to the test.” (Luke 4:12NIV).  I always ask Him to forgive me for doubting Him.  I am thankful that He doesn’t leave me hanging because really He should. 

Why was He so patient with Gideon and likewise with me?  God is longsuffering.  He loves us so much He is willing to wait for us.  He is willing to prove Himself again and again.  If Gideon’s heart was anything like mine, he longed for God.  He longed to know Him.  He wasn’t testing Him to try and proved him WRONG.  He was testing him because He so desperately longed for God to be RIGHT.  Every time God answers a prayer in my heart my faith is strengthened.  He is stacking up mountains of His own personal evidence in my heart.  I’m hoping this means in the long run I will test Him less.  When I reach the end of this journey, my prayer is that I will know Him so well that there is nothing left for me to do here but go and meet Him face to face.