"The Shirt Off His Back"

Everyone knows that expression.  It’s used to describe really generous people.  Yesterday we were invited by some new friends to go swimming and hang out.  We’ve actually been overwhelmed by how friendly everyone is here in our new home.

 So we arrive at the pool play date.  The kids have a blast.  The grown ups hang out, and then it’s suggested that we go get ice cream.  Everyone is on board.  We begin to get ready to go.  J. comes up to me with a distressed look on his face.  Seeing as this happens regularly a few times a day, I am not highly alarmed.  He tells me he forgot to bring his shoes.  He’s upset because now he can’t go into the ice cream store with no shoes.  Really what kind of a mom doesn’t even notice that her kid got in the car, arrived at the house, swam etc… all without any shoes on his feet?  I must raise my hand, because apparently that mom was me yesterday.   The host of our get together notices our plight. J’s nearly in tears and I’m basically chastising him for coming without footwear.  She leaves and returns from her car with a pair of flip-flops.  “I found an extra pair in the trunk”, she tells me.  I’m so relieved.  On to the ice cream store we go.

So that was really generous of her and we’ve probably all done that once or twice; given up an extra pair of shorts or t-shirt or diaper to another mom in need.  But my story doesn’t end there, because when we arrive at the ice cream store and walk in both Ricardo and I notice that her son the same age as J. isn’t wearing any shoes!  She had literally given me her son’s only pair of shoes.  I was floored. 

 It was a gesture that only the most generous soul would do.  It’s what Jesus would do.  It really touched me to the core.  I hope I can be more generous like that.  It was an amazing lesson for J.  We noted to him later that his friend was walking around without shoes so that he wouldn’t be upset not to have them.   I think we all need to challenge ourselves to be more like that, to give not just the extra that we have, but to give sacrificially to others.   I know giving J. a pair of flip flops might not be quite on the same level as the poor woman in the bible who gave the last of her small amount of money, but it's the same concept. 

“ All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.”  Luke 21:4 NIV

Our New House!

The story of how we ended up in our new home is long.  It’s really four years long because that’s how long we pondered, prayed, and worked to get here.  We didn’t know where God was leading us for the majority of it.  We didn’t know when or how He would do it.  But in the end, He did. 

Four years ago we found out we were having a third child and knew that at some point in the nearish future we would want to move out of our apartment and give our kids some space and much needed fresh air.  That began a roller coast of emotions for me. I spent a lot of that time wondering when God would move us, how He would do it, where we would go, how we would afford it etc…  Ricardo remained steadfast and certain that God’s timing would be perfect and we must wait for that time before so much as lifting a finger. 

We looked at a lot of communities before and after we visited the town where we are currently settled.  This one just felt right.  Still there were some logistical challenges to living here, mostly centered around how far away it is from work/church.  We waited and prayed some more. 

A year and a half ago we drove by what is now our home and Ricardo immediately fell in love.    Truthfully, it really was beautiful, but to me I just saw something way out of the ballpark for us.  We admired it from the outside and drove back to New York.  Unbeknownst to us the home was almost sold that spring to another family, only to have the deal fall through at the very last minute.  It went back up for sale and a year ago we decided to tour the inside of some other homes and apprehensively I told our realtor we'd like to look at the inside of this home too.  Ricardo again was in love with this house.  I worried that it was too big, would require too much upkeep, and quite frankly was just way too wonderful for us. 

So many things had to fall into place in order for us to even consider this house a possibility, and amazingly they all did.  We had an offer accepted in March and then waited for our apartment sale to close before we would officially be able to purchase this house. 

Everything on the apartment sale went smoothly until the very end.  Our buyers had to get approval from the board as we owned a co-op apartment and at the very last hour we were told they might not be accepted.  Basically the majority of the board was voting “no”.  They were having one final meeting and if one person changed their mind it would go through and if not, we would be without a buyer and stuck in our apartment. 

I knew right then and there that God was with us.  He was going to give us a clear answer on this move.  Either He was going to shut down the whole thing or confirm for us that He was with us in buying our new home.  At 11:30 pm, four hours after the start of the meeting, we got the call that our buyers were approved!  A few days after that we were able to buy this house!

We’ve been here three weeks now.  I have a ton of boxes I’ve given up on unpacking for now.  But it’s been confirmed in my heart with every new person we meet and when I see the joy in the faces of my children, that we made the right decision.  We belong here!  I can’t wait to see what God has in store for us.  Our home is beautiful and it will be shared with everyone we know.  We know He didn’t give it to us only for our personal enjoyment, although personally I can say we are enjoying it very much!

Here's a few pics of our first week in our new digs:

                                 Last moment in our apartment.  So many memories!

The new digs!

Lots of great neighbors!

Love the wildlife!

Protection

Not my companion but this is pretty much
what they all looked like

Sometimes I ponder the ways God has protected me from danger that I am completely unaware of.  Truly we have no idea how He has altered our paths time and time again to keep something horrible from happening to us.  It could be many times in a single day.  I hope someday when I finally meet God face to face, He’ll show me a picture of how He protected me over the course of my lifetime.

Of course occasionally we find ourselves in direct situations where we experience God’s protection in our lives in a way that we can’t deny that His hand kept us from imminent danger.  This happened to me fourteen years ago when I went to live and study for a semester in Costa Rica.

It was my second day in the country and our group of American exchange students met up for an orientation to our new city.  We each had been placed to live for the semester with local families and because we didn’t yet know our way around or how to use public transportation we were supposed to be dropped off and picked up directly by our host family. 

As we were toured around the city I noticed something quite distasteful.  The city was chalk full of scary, mangy, feral dogs.  They were everywhere.  Now while I love a cute cuddly puppy, I’ve never been a big dog lover.  These dogs were down right scary to look at and when I saw one I tried to get far, far away. 

By the end of the long day of introductions and loads of new information we gathered in the city plaza to await our rides back to our homes.  One by one my classmates were picked up.  Finally I found myself the lone exchange student waiting on my ride.  This was the era prior to the common use of cell phones so the program director had to use a pay phone to call my family.  He returned and reassured me they were on their way and would be there shortly.  He then left me there in the middle of the plaza to wait for them.  Looking back on that I really cannot believe he just left me there alone, a young 20 year old women in a foreign country with absolutely no way to contact him or anyone else should something happen.

I waited for a while and it began to get dark.  For any of you that have ever traveled to Central or South America, the cities all have these huge plazas and after dark these places can become home to all kinds of vagrants and unsavory types.  Sure enough as it got darker I began to notice some intoxicated men and other “sketchy” individuals walking nearby.  At that moment I had that panicky pit of my stomach feeling you feel when you are in danger.  What was I going to do if they approached me?  I frantically looked around me and noticed sitting nearby was one of those feral dogs I had seen roaming the streets.  “Great.” I thought.  “I’m going to be attacked by a drunk and a dog!.”  I wanted to run but I didn’t have anywhere to go.  Soon a few of the loitering men began to approach me speaking in slurred Spanish.  But just as they took two more steps in my direction the craziest thing happened.  The dog jumped up and lunged at them, biting one of them.   The startled men hurried away.

Over the course of the next half hour or so the dog barked wildly gnashing its teeth at anyone who walked even remotely near me.  If nobody was walking nearby the dog stood or sat close to my side.  I could hardly believe what I was seeing.  I had never seen this dog before in my life.  It didn’t know me, yet it sensed it needed to protect me.  Eventually, probably at least an hour after I had been left by the director in the plaza, my host family finally showed up to retrieve me.  As I drove off with them, I made eye contact with that stringy, dingy dog and silently whispered, “Thank you.”

I believe with all my heart God sent that dog to protect me.  Don’t believe it?  That’s okay, but I just cannot chalk that experience up to chance.  Sometimes I struggle with why God places His protection on some and not others.  I know He doesn’t promise I will always have His protection physically.  Spiritually yes, physically no.  Thankfully I know that His ways are not mine.  His reasons are not always understood.  I have to trust that because He is God.  I did not create Him.  He created me.  Maybe He protected me that day because He knew someday I would tell the story.  All I know is I am so very thankful for that little dog and for my God who sent him to me.

Making Sense

I’m not sure if this has ever happened to any of you, but right now Ricardo and I have been praying about something that if it actually comes to fruition will make my entire life make sense up to this point.  I honestly don’t know if that’s even supposed to happen, but I’ve spent a lot of time wondering about certain skills and traits that I have, coupled with those of my husband, as well as a love for the world, and an ultimate love for Jesus and a burning desire to serve him more; and how that would all come together to make sense someday.  After years and years of this I believe with my heart that it may someday soon come to fruition.  It’s not like I don’t believe God has us where He wants us right now.  I feel at the moment we are where we need to be.  But there is just so much more on our hearts to do that we have hoped for a long time.

So with that said, and while I know I am being very vague, what does one do when one feels that have found a true purpose for their life that incorporates every talent and gift that God has given them?  Well…for me at least I am just praying about it, and believing that it’s from Him and that in time He’ll make it happen.  That’s what having faith is right?  Believing in something before you see the results, not after the fact.  There are stories of this all throughout the bible.   Abraham had to take his son up to an altar with the purpose to sacrifice his life even though it didn’t make sense, because he had faith that God would still fulfill the promise He had made to him.  Noah had to build the ark before the flood began.  Joshua marched around a wall for a week before the walls came crashing down.  There are many, many more stories like these all throughout the bible.  What did it feel like to stand firm and believe God to do something before the results were seen?  Did any of them ever doubt that God would come through? 

That’s where I am right now.  The desired outcome to our prayers seems so far fetched if not impossible.  Maybe that’s why it’s taken us so long to actually begin asking God to do it.  But if we don’t have the faith to believe that He can, then certainly God never will.  And then what if we’re wrong?  What if it never happens?  Does that mean my life no longer makes sense?  I don’t even have an answer to that right now.  My heart just won’t let me go there.  Maybe that’s the way the people of faith in the bible felt.   Eventually the outcome proved the faith they had.  I’m hoping the same will be true for us.

Paper Cuts

My oldest son J. started sucking his thumb when he was 3 months old.  Can I tell how sweet it is to see a little baby chomping on their tiny thumb?  Honestly R. And I were both thumb suckers as kids so it was really no surprise to us to end up with a thumb loving child.  As the years passed and the thumb sucking did not, we began to think of ways to help him quit the habit.  We tried band aids but he would just pull them off when he wanted a suck.  We tried hot sauce.  We tried rewards.  We tried threats.  We read him a book called "Jake's Best Thumb" about a boy who finally realizes he doesn't need his thumb.  Nothing worked.

 Recently J. turned six and began to want to stop sucking his thumb a little bit.  But as with any habit or addiction, it's not that easy. He was just so used to doing it that he couldn't will himself to stop.  We encouraged him to pray and ask God to help him. And he did.  Every night at bed time he always said, "...and Jesus make me not suck my thumb."  The thumb sucking still did not wane.  He became frustrated.  "I pray and ask God to make me stop, but He doesn't.".  We explained to him that God would not make him stop, but he could ask God to help him and then he needed to do his part and make an effort.  It sort of seemed to go in one ear and out the other and the thumb sucking continued.

 Then a few days ago an interesting thing happened.  J was reading a book and somehow managed to get a deep paper cut on the sucking thumb.  He begged for a bandaid and I obliged.  The evening went on and the kids got ready for bed.  After I left them in their room, I was sitting out on the couch.  Suddenly J. called out from his bed.  "Hey Mommy!  I have a bandaid on my thumb and now I can't suck it!". He seemed very happy about this.  The next morning he proudly came out of his room.  "I didn't suck my thumb at all!" he said with his face glowing.  Later as we drove to school I told him, "You see J., you prayed that God would help you stop sucking your thumb and He gave you a paper cut.  At first you were upset about the paper cut but now you can see how God used it to help you stop sucking your thumb!  Sometimes God answers us but it's not how we expect He will". J. Smiled at me.  "Yup!  That's right Mommy!"

 I can't help but see how this story can apply to us all.  How many times in life do we pray and ask God to intervene in a situation, but have a clear idea in our own mind of HOW He should answer us?  Then when He gives us our own paper cut we don't see it as an answer to that prayer.  We might grumble or think God has still failed to work in our situation.  Only later with some time and perspective are we able to see how God was using the paper cut to answer our prayer.  My prayer today for myself and for all of us is that we would recognize God in the paper cut and thank Him for it!

 'Call to me and I will answer you. I'll tell you marvelous and wondrous things that you could never figure out on your own.' (Jeremiah 33:3 MSG)

Going to the Promised Land

I've been reading through the bible and I'm currently in the book of Deuteronomy.   My favorite chapter has always been chapter 8.  God brings me back to it all the time whenever I need a reminder that every good thing in my life comes from Him.  I'm going to highlight some of the verses in it and how I've see them recently in a new way.

 A little background info:  At this point in the bible the Israelites have traveled out of Egypt and have spent a long time wandering around in the desert.  Despite that, God has abundantly provided for them, doing many miraculous things in their midst.  They are now getting ready to enter the land He had promised to them.  But before they do, God is speaking to them through Moses and reminding them of everything He has brought them through.  Here are four parts of Deuteronomy 8 that really stick out for me.

 1. "Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands." (Deuteronomy 8:2 NIV84).

 I feel like the journey the Israelites took through the desert can be likened to our own journey on earth.  The same reminder for them can be applied to ourselves.   The desert is like a symbol for our earthly home.  It's not perfect and wonderful all the time. It's hard and rough and we are left longing for something more.  That longing will not be fulfilled until we reach the Promised Land.  For us that is heaven.

 2. "He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord." (Deuteronomy 8:3 NIV84)

 The desert had no ability to sustain the Israelites.  They had to rely on God for provision, which came in the form of manna.  The bible is like our manna to help sustain us through our earthly journey.  It contains promises, truths, directions, encouragement, and best of all the ability to come alive in our hearts and point out specific things to us. That's why it's so important that we look to it every day.  Like the manna was only given to the Israelites to sustain them for one day at a time, so is the word of God for us.  We need it each day for the challenges of that day alone.

 3. "Observe the commands of the Lord your God, walking in his ways and revering him. For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land—a land with streams and pools of water, with springs flowing in the valleys and hills; a land with wheat and barley, vines and fig trees, pomegranates, olive oil and honey;" (Deuteronomy 8:6-8 NIV84)

 I often wondered why the Israelites were so doubtful about where they were going.  God showed them signs and wonders.  How hard was it to trust that the Promised Land was going to be everything that God said it was?  Yet I have found myself in exactly the same place, questioning the goodness of the heaven that is promised to me despite seeing Gods faithfulness and miracles in my own life.  It's in our nature to fear the unknown and to doubt what we cannot see.  But God wants us to trust that what he has for us beyond this earthly life is good and more than we can even imagine.

 4. "When you have eaten and are satisfied, praise the Lord your God for the good land he has given you. Be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery."(Deuteronomy 8:10-14 NIV84)

 How many people with an abundance of earthly wealth really believe it has been given to them as a blessing from God?  Not many I would guess.  Again, It is in our nature to be prideful and to think that we have what we do because we've worked hard, earned it ourselves, and deserve it.  Receiving wealth and earthly pleasures while we are living runs runs a risk that our prideful nature will lose sight of where they came from.  It's no surprise to me that it's those who have very little material things that are more likely to live with a greater joy in their hearts because they have not lost sight of God.  They are able to find this joy in Him and not in things.  Thankfully in heaven we will be able to enjoy everything God gives us in abundance without running any risk of forgetting who gave it to us.  Unlike the Israelites who entered the Promised Land, when we get to heaven we will never forget who brought us there because He will be there with us!

 One last thought about my friends the Israelites:

 Before entering the Promised Land, while they faced the challenges of their 40 years in the desert, the Israelites often cried out to God, telling him they wished hey had been left in Egypt.  I never quite understood this. But yet again I am realizing how often we do the same when we are in the midst of a trial or even just living life.  We question Him.  We begin to question every promise He has ever made us and whether He is real at all.  We say:  Why would you do this to me?  If you were real then you would not be doing this to me.  And just like they forgot the parting of the Red Sea and the manna and water coming out of a rock; we forget everything He has ever done for us and how He's helped us before, simply because we can't seem to see Him in our current struggle.  We shake our heads at the Israelites.  How could they forget?  Yet we are just the same.  We are on the same journey.  A journey that God sees in its entirety, while we only see what is directly in front of us.  He sees around every corner.  And while we are shaking our head or asking why, He is telling us:

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
 neither are your ways my ways,”   declares the Lord.
  “As the heavens are higher than the earth so are my ways higher than your ways  and my thoughts than your thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8, 9 NIV84)

 He wants us to trust Him as we fulfill our journey here on earth.  His promises for what is ahead when we finish are more than we can even imagine!

God Knows My Name

My name Kate, is short for Katherine, a very popular and common name.   For those of you who know me personally, my maiden name is also very common.  Common first name plus common last name equals a very non-unique name that plagued my desire to be original, especially as a teenager.

 When I was three years old my family bought a home on a cute family friendly block in a small town west of Boston, Massachusetts.  We were really fortunate to have children living in so many of the houses on our block, and right next door to us was a family who had a little girl my exact same age.  But more ironically than having a same age neighbor, this little girl had my same first name...and last name!  That's right folks, my newest pal and I had exactly the same name.  When we started elementary school we couldn't even be called "Katie (last initial)".  We had to go by "Katie (middle initial)".

   When I was eight years old my father got a new job in Pennsylvania, so we moved.  Lest you think my days of sharing my name with a close friend were over, you're wrong!  Upon arriving to my first day of the third grade at my very tiny private school, I was introduced to another Kate with my same last name!  What are the odds?

 By the time I reached middle school, I was so desperate for a name to call my own that I began playing around with the spelling of mine.  Kayt, Kaitee, Kait, and finally settling on Kayte.  I spelled my name like that all the way through the eighth grade. In high school both of us Kates played on the same field hockey team and due to our obvious difference in heights, our teammates nicknamed me "Lil Katie" and the other Kate, "Big Katie".  These nicknames stuck all the way through high school and even to this day some of my high school friends still call me that.

 Sharing my name for so many years even effected how my husband and I named our own children.  I nixed many a name because it was ranked too "popular" on the Social Security website.  The funny thing about that is that God actually gave me a husband with a very uncommon last name, a gift I suppose for all the years I spent sharing my name.  Still, I  didn't want my children to have their last initial attached to their common first name in the event there were others with it in their classes;  so we chose less popular ones.

 When I think back to those years struggling to assert myself as an individual, with unique qualities, not the same as someone else, I wish I had these reminders from the Lord:

 "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;  I have called you by name; you are Mine! (Isaiah 43:1 NASB)

And 

 "The LORD called Me from the womb;  From the body of My mother He named Me." (Isaiah 49:1 NASB)

 My name was important.  It was uniquely mine even if it was not unique.  God did not mistake me for someone else.  He always knew my name before it was even given to me.  If I had nothing else in this world, my name could not be taken away from me.

 These promises from God remind me of a song we sing with our campers at Royal Family Kids Camp.  For anyone reading this who doesn't know what that is, Royal Family Kids Camp is a camp for children who are in the foster care system.  Many of them have suffered abuse you couldn't even imagine.  Almost all of them have suffered hurt and neglect.  During their week at camp we seek to build them up in the Lord, teaching them about His love and promises for their life.  One of their favorite songs which is accompanied by an intricate step routine (that almost all of them learn how to do) is called "I Am Not Forgotten".

 I am not forgotten
 I am not forgotten
 I am not forgotten
 God knows my name. 
He knows my name. 

 Light over darkness 
Strength over weakness 
Joy over sadness 
He knows my name 

 Father to the Fatherless
 Friend to the friendless 
Hope for the hopeless 
He knows my name 

 I will praise You 
I will praise You
 For I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

  I am not forgotten
 Never forsaken 

 Israel & New Breed lyrics 

 The fact is that whether we've been cast aside or grown up with plenty, our name is precious to God.  He knows it.  He loves it.  He knew we would have it and it is special to Him.  More special to Him is who we are.  Our name might be forgotten by those around us.  It might be commonplace. It might be cursed by some.  But our name and the person it belongs to is loved by God.  We can count on that.