Rich Girl

I grew up with everything a kid could ever want.  Thanks to my parents I was fairly unaware of the fact that we were well off.  My parents denied me some of the things that my private school friends received like new cars, cash, and fancy ski trips. However, I never lacked for anything, and quite frankly looking back I got to do a lot, went to a lot of interesting places around the world, and lived a pretty cushy life.  I may not have been part of the top 1 %, but I had to have been living in a family that was at least in the top 10%.  Compared to the rest of world we were way up there.

The front door of my childhood home

I went to an excellent private school, a top college, and an Ivy League school for graduate studies.  Couple that with the rest of my upbringing and I entered adulthood with a voice that spoke to my subconscious telling me that I should reach for the same in my own adult life.  Work hard.  Gain success.  Be financially stable (meaning with significant extra money beyond one’s expenses).  If you do all of that you’ll be happy.  If you have a comfortable life with lots of cushion to fall back on, you’ll be safe from worry. 

Except here’s the little problem with that:  #1 Life isn’t supposed to be about having a comfortable stable existence and being happy.  It’s supposed to be about doing God’s will no matter what that is.  #2 Having too many fall back plans means you’re not trusting God to take care of you; you’re trusting yourself.

So here I am.  I have no permanent form of employment that utilizes the skills I learned in all those years of schooling.  Because of that we don’t have extra money to sock away for a rainy day or to fall back on in case the bottom falls out.  I had to break it to my Dad, that I will probably never become a school principal or superintendant like he hoped I might (Sorry Dad you know I love you! ; ) My life looks nothing like the way I grew up and it’s probably never going to. 

But you know what?  I’m home with my kids and I’ve never been happier.  I have time to serve God with all my heart.  I have time to build lasting relationships with other mothers in my community and my children are right along side of me while I do that.   I have a wonderful husband who loves me despite all of my faults, is patient, longsuffering, and kind. I’ve been learning to trust God to supply our needs and even seen Him supply extras that we don’t need.  I’ve been learning that happiness doesn’t come from having it all.  It comes from loving people and being reminded that I have a Savior who loves me in the biggest way possible. 

I had a really great childhood.  I’m thankful for that.  It won’t be the same kind of childhood I give my own children, but I feel certain they will feel similarly grateful as I do about their own upbringing, just for different reasons.

When I struggle with feeling like I don’t have what I should (and I struggle with this very much even despite what I stated above), I turn to God’s word and it always encourages me.  Today I read this and I really feel like it spoke into my life:

“Do not be overawed when a man grows rich,
   

when the splendor of his house increases;

for he will take nothing with him when he dies,
   

 his splendor will not descend with him.

Though while he lived he counted himself blessed—
  
  and men praise you when you prosper—

he will join the generation of his fathers,
   
 who will never see the light of life.

A man who has riches without understanding
   
 is like the beasts that perish.” 

Psalm 49:16-20 NIV84

God please let me be free of making my life about myself.  It’s such a short one and I want to live it for you.  In the end no tangible thing I build for myself here will go with me, so let my life be about how much I can love, encourage, and lift up others.  In the end, it’s your kingdom (and not riches) that’s the only thing worth building up.